Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Shahs of Sunset: Smorgasboard of Food, Funky Jealousy and Chia Pet Apologies

"Shahs Of Sunset" season two reunion

Despite me believing this season of Shahs was lackluster, the show has pulled in such high ratings thats its earned itself reunion show status. And of course, even though I complained that the show lacked the jenna sais quois it had last season, I was still hooked to my DVR at naptime yesterday to catch the flying chia pet allegations! So rather than do a full recap, when I'm sure you watched, lets just get into the tidbits that caught my eyes...

When the reunion started the first thing I noticed was the buffet that was sitting in front of them. What was that all about? It wasn't just a small amount of food, we're talking the buffet table at the Bellagio. I think I saw everything from sushi to tandoori game hen. Oh, and of course the olives that GG threatened to throw at Asa to enhance her cottage cheese and cellulite. And then I realized that this was them mocking Reza for his love of providing a large spread when he invites someone to his house for a confrontation. Remember the breakfast where GG was disinvited to Cabo? Or even his picnic with his boyfriend, he had a caprese salad, some tabbouleh and even chicken wings but no napkins! Ok, so I exaggerate, but the food made it look like a Gorga Christening at the Brownstone instead of a reunion show. 

And lets just talk about Chia pet, shall we? I loved Lilly's haircut! I didn't like the large poofiness, it's quite possible she was carrying crispy and Africa, GG's weapons under her hair. And cover up the cleavage some and I loved the dress. A little pagentesque, yes. Reminiscent of Teresa in the New Jersey reunion where she was ridiculed for her dress, possibly, but appropriately gorgeous, yes! 

MJ finds Reza's pill popping question hilarious.And then the show went from lighthearted to to after school special, which was just a little uncomfortable to watch. So the group (sans GG on her island, drinking a bottle of whiskey and playing with her guns) decides to confront MJ on alcoholism and pill popping. So I wondered, how real is all this? Recall on Real Housewives of BH reunion last year that Adrienne decided to go against Lisa and get Camille and Brandi on her side? Unfortunately for Maloof, Brandi outed her basically proving that she went after Lisa in hopes of securing her spot for the next season. Was this the case with MJ? Does she really have a problem or was it all done for publicity? If they really are her friend, why were they having an intervention on national television? I'm shocked to say it, but GG was right, if it's an issue do it in private. And GG, homegirl, outing yourself as one who takes xanax, valium and clonapin was not necessary. If you take it with a prescription from your psychiatrist, that's ok, sweetheart, but if you're taking clonapin for recreational use, we're going to have to throw the intervention banner your way. And is Reza that worried about MJ that he no longer wants to enable her but instead thinks outing her will force her to get help? Did we not learn from Kyle and Kim's big blow up at the end of season one of Housewives of BH that by outing someone you love could end your relationship? Soberness does not instantly patch your relationship, just talk to Kyle.

And then Cohen threw out a montage of the parents. (Did you notice my abrupt shift into the parental discussion from MJ's alleged substance abuse? I was trying to demonstrate just how badly Andy transitioned from one piece to the next.)  Quite possibly, I believe the parents were the salvage of the show and had the best one liners. Asa's mother responding to her deceleration that she was a Persian Pop Priestess was priceless, "What the hell is that?" It's always our mothers that can tell it to us straight and put things into perspective, isn't it? Because Asa, sweet pea, your degrees in Psychology and Philosophy and your three PhD's in Persian Pop Princess (whatever that means) isn't going to get you far in life. Trust me, one psych major to another. Listen to your mama and get a graduate degree. 

And then there was Reza's mother with her peaceful demeanor who told him in Farci, very nonchalantly, to start saving money and stop buying the "Gucci Mucci." I thought it was just in the old school Indian culture where our parents make rhyming words out of everything, apparently Persians do it too.

And let me just say, I find it hard to believe that Lilly told her parents two days before the show aired that she was on a television show. Granted, I watch a lot of Bravo, a lot, but how could someone get away with not seeing her vast... personality plastered all over the tv and internet? Ok, so maybe it was all over Bravo, Bravotv.com and all the other reality gossip blogs I read, but still?

Cuckoo LocaThe finale argument between Asa and GG was just unneccesary. It is blatantly obvious that GG has DSM diagnosable anger issues, apparently is on anti-psychotic medication (clonapin) so Asa trying to discuss with her the pool party fight where GG was threatened to be tossed like a salad was pointless. GG kept going on and on and Asa, with her soft Cuckoo Loca voice was getting nowhere.  If anything, she was coming off as a bit condescending, fueling GG even more. I was a bit irritated with Andy because he just let the ruckus keep going for ratings sake. MJ even interrupted to ask what the question was and never responded! After the requisite five minute argument ending the episode to hopefully entice viewers to tune in next week he mumbled something about an impasse.

Overall, fairly good episode. There was some serious catty accusations, attempted apologies that were lackluster (really MJ, are you truly sorry for calling Lilly a chia pet?) and some seriously inflated egos (Yes, Asa, we know your funky. But since when was funky a good thing?).  So will I tune in next week to see the demise of the friendship between Reza and MJ? Absoltely, but be careful, Mr. Mustache, recall the carefully calculated divorce between Jill Zarin and Bethenny? You could just be plotting your departure from the show only to give MJ a spin off. I can see it now, MJ and the Persian Drake get married, MJ Ever After....

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